I made a cardinal sin…I blogged about my son’s birth and not my daughter’s. Yes, the princess of the house is pissed. Doesn’t matter that I had a skin for this site made especially for her and wished her happy b-day…nooo!
Hmm…how can I describe being pregnant with my daughter? Drama. I was pregnant with twins and lost one. Then I lost weight (20 lbs) and although I ate like a pig I couldn’t keep weight on. That’s one thing I love about pregnancy, I lose weight and have a hard time keeping it on. Sigh….ok continuing on…
My ex-husband and I separated when I was five months pregnant and never lived under the same roof after that. I was emotional to say the least but I really bonded with my daughter. I used to talk to her, sing to her and we had this game we would play where she would kick really hard and her hand/foot imprint would show and I’d show it off. 🙂 She was like a Mexican jumping bean inside of me – the only time she stayed still was when I was laying on the couch and the cat was laying on my stomach purring. When I was pregnant with her I ate steak everyday…ok this is starting to depress me. 🙁
Anyway, when I went to my last doctor’s visit he said I was dilating and I was happy. I went back to work and said “I have to go now, this bun is ready to come out of the oven!” Everyone was so happy for me. I called home, told Mom I was on my way. Called the ex and told him I was going to the hospital. Remember that point, it’s important. It’s Thursday. Remember that too.
My Dad took me to the hospital. Now one thing I have to give my Dad credit for – he was there rock solid for me during the delivery drama. It’s one of the fond memories I have of him. Anyway, he took me and Mom to the hospital, I got all checked in and about two hours later the pain was becoming unbearable. My grandmother was at the hospital by this point. Note, my ex was not there.
Three hours later, no baby. No pain medicine kicked in (and that was a huge needle too) and I still wasn’t any further dilated. Let’s fast forward to Friday night. Yes, I am still having contractions. Still no further dilated. Dad brought my Mom to the hospital and they faithfully sat with me. No, I didn’t forget my ex, he still didn’t show up.
Fast forward to Saturday…yes I’m still having contractions, still not fully dilated. I was pretty ticked by this point. My grandmother called and I told her “The nurse made the elephants go away because they were unsanitary”. Then I immediately apologized because I knew I was talking out of my mind but I had been in pain for so long I was delirious. She immediately came and sat with me until my parents could get there after work, which they did. The talks began about sending me home because I wasn’t progressing. I was pissed at this point and I said I wasn’t going home. I started to cry with anger and I told the doctor hell would freeze before I went home with my daughter still in my stomach.
Hell must of froze over on Sunday afternoon because they sent me home. You really didn’t want to talk to me during that time because I still hadn’t heard from my ex and they sent me home. Hell probably froze cause I turned into the devil, I was that pissed.
Fast forward to Monday night, the contractions were so hard the doctor recommended I go to the hospital. Sure enough I was making progress! So here we were again, Mom, Dad and grandmother waiting for this baby to be born. My ex called to let me know he had been in a fender-bender with our second car. My Mom didn’t even want to give me the phone but when I heard his voice telling me that, something died inside. I realized how that marriage was so dead and at that moment I detested him….completely.
Visiting hours came and went so sitting in the birthing room, all alone I spoke to my daughter and I told her that it was just the two of us and we were going to be okay. She did her kick/imprint hand thing and I could feel her knuckles. I cried and I told her that we were going to be ok, that I love her but I couldn’t try to patch things up with her Dad anymore. Some things just weren’t meant to be. Then I started singing to her. I think once I made that decision something happened because after that, things went pretty quick. She was born Tuesday morning bright and early.
Now keep in mind I had been in labor from Thursday – Sunday, sent home, went back on Monday and delivered on Tues. I should have been exhausted but I took one look at my daughter and I was energized. I followed her around with my IV stand too. I tried to breast feed her and the nurse was so patient trying to get it to work, but my nipple was too large for my daughter’s mouth. They brought me a pump but looking at my little girl, it was worth it. The ex showed up that afternoon and my family was ticked. I was at peace because I had my little girl….well, see for yourself.
I hold no grudges against the ex and my kids now are happy, healthy children, which I thank God for everyday.