We often talk about people in terms of success. Career titles, income brackets, degrees, and possessions. But what if we’ve been measuring value the wrong way? Years ago, someone gave me an analogy I’ve never forgotten: some people are hamburgers, and some people are steaks.
At the time, I didn’t fully grasp it. But over the years, it’s become clear: this isn’t about status. It’s about mindset. About how someone shows up in their life, regardless of what they have.
So let me ask: what really makes someone “steak”?
Steak Isn’t a Job Title. It’s a Mentality.
My brother worked as a bellman for a hotel chain for most of his life. He got the job young and stuck with it until he passed away. Management liked him, customers loved him, and he was excellent at what he did. Even though he had the skill to move into management, he chose not to.
I asked him…why? He knew what mattered most to him. Human connection, staying active, enjoying his work and he didn’t want the extra responsibility of a higher title. He was content, fulfilled, and by all measures successful. Not because of his paycheck, but because he picked a career that made sense to him.
Same goes for one of the sanitation workers on my street. He takes pride in his work, does it well, and does it with joy. I see him in summer, winter, rain, or heat. Always showing up. Always bringing good energy. He’s not chasing someone else’s idea of success. He’s living his own.
These are the types of people I call steak.
The Misconception: Steak Is Something You Can Buy
Too often, we confuse steak with status. I’ve seen people say they won’t date someone without a certain income, a certain car, a certain brand of laptop. Yes, you read that right. Someone once dismissed a date over not owning a Mac.
We act like success can be purchased or worn. No amount of money turns a hamburger mindset into steak. A high-paying job doesn’t automatically mean depth, drive, or integrity.
On the flip side, someone with modest income, no degree, and a job that isn’t glamorous might still be living a life filled with purpose, character, and self-awareness.
That’s the real difference. Steak isn’t about having more. It’s about being more.
Don’t Judge by the Menu. Get to Know the Ingredients.
If you want to find real substance in people, whether in dating, friendship, or hiring, stop filtering by surface-level traits. Start asking better questions. Look at how someone lives, how they treat others, how they carry themselves. That’s where steak lives.
It’s tempting to focus on possessions or appearances. It’s faster, simpler. But if you’re only looking at what someone has, you’ll miss out on who they are.
And who they are? That’s the only part that really matters.
📌 Changelog
- May 18, 2025: Article re-written to add clarity. Changed image.
- Oct 31, 2008: Original article posted.
