I received a couple of messages apologizing for their behavior last week. After watching Burn the Stage #4, they realized their behavior could be better. I want to genuinely say thank you and I appreciate the kind words. Everyone makes mistakes. What people will remember is how you react to it.
Disclaimer: This is my opinion. Feel free to disagree with it, I don’t care. At the end of the day, my moral and ethic codes are what I live by. I’m not saying anyone should change what they do (I don’t care and it is none of my business). I’m talking about a decision I made for me to be comfortable.
I was reminded of a situation, that I’ve talked about publicly before, and it helped me make a decision that has been haunting me. I have many LGBT friends. One male couple had moved into a new apartment. One of the men (A) was in the closet. The other (B) was out and very proud. They live in America. Before they fully moved in, A decided do a tour of their apartment. While showing off the kitchen, living room, etc. he explained it was a two bedroom apartment. When he came to the bedroom, he showed the room, the large walk-in closet, and we could see the queen size bed in there. When he showed the second bedroom, it was smaller and he said it was going to be office space for B. He showed the bathroom, ended the tour, and started streaming a game.
Many people watching the stream didn’t realize he was gay because he hasn’t come out publicly. Watching the stream, some got it, some didn’t. What no one did was say anything about him being gay. There were a couple of comments like, “Oh! I didn’t know! COOL!” but other than that, nothing. Why? Because of the way he handled it. He said, “this is the bedroom…” not “this is our bedroom…” He made no mention at all that he was in a relationship even though he made it clear he was not living alone. We followed his lead and just chatted about the apartment. There were a couple of thousand people watching and we supported him by doing what he did. He was in the closet but wanted us to know. He trusted us to act right, so we did. Talking to him later, he said knew which people got it and was thankful they were quiet.
How did I know some people didn’t realize he was gay? When B streamed later on that night, I recognized some of the screen names (some of them I know, some of them I know of) saying, “I didn’t know you and A were kickin’ it! Congrats!” B, who is out, chatted normally about it. B made it clear it was okay to talk about the relationship with HIM but we didn’t go on the internet and blast it. B doesn’t do that because A is in the closet.
I see JiKook the same way. If they are real couple and I say that because they have not acknowledged anything publicly, I would treat them the same way in real life. Because they haven’t said anything publicly, it is not my place to do it. I never want to be someone to out a couple especially by accident because I don’t have concrete information they are a couple. I would follow their lead, do what they do, show my support, but not cross the line they’ve set.
GCF reminds me of the apartment tour. So do all the JiKook moments. Burn the Stage. I’m not a persona or a fake name hiding anonymously. It’s been bothering me lately how to balance it and I found my answer – as I would in real life since it is real life. For me, there is a difference between saying, “Jimin was in the room” and “Jimin was in the room because Jungkook trusts him or they have a close bond” and “Jimin was in the room because he’s the significant other. This proves their relationship. OMG, why are you ignoring it? You’re pissing me off, the blatant disregard for their relationship. STOP ignoring the elephant in the room!” The last one is not what I would do in real life, especially now, because honestly IDGAF about those who don’t support them. There isn’t a law anywhere that says people have to accept them their bond, whatever level it is, and focusing any energy on them is a complete waste of my time. I care about the ones that are supportive of their efforts. I will talk about them, discuss things going on with them, but when it comes to people connecting the dots about them…I leave it to fans to do it, or not. Doesn’t matter to me if they do it or not.
The reason why things became blurred for me is due to TaeKook shippers asking me questions about their ship and JiKook. THEY were beginning to believe JiKook was real, at the very minimum question their ship, and my posts were for THEM because I was repeating myself a lot. I used those situations as a teaching tool about relationships, something I’ve always done. It snowballed into me (and them) receiving behavior from people, that we saw in the latest Burn the Stage episode, BTS would not do or condone. I scrolled through some of the profiles of people telling me what to say, how to say it, what to think, what my intentions are (they were 100% wrong) and it blows my mind how negative they are. I gave up scrolling because I could not find a day where they weren’t complaining, saying they were frustrated or trying to beat people over the head with their agenda about someone else’s life, which is none of their business anyway. Weeks worth of posts. It makes me wonder what broke them that they have more interest in someone else’s life than their own?
Anyway, I’m mentioning this because I will most likely go back and edit some of my posts to reflect my moral and ethical codes. The JiKook week posts are a good example of balance to me. I felt the need to do something so I used their pictures and celebrated love and life as I hope, one day everywhere, people will be free to love who they want legally. Nowhere did I state an opinion on the status of their relationship. To me, it shows my support (to those that get it) without going over the boundaries JiKook set. When I eventually cross paths with them, I want them to know I respect their choices, their privacy and will keep their secrets. You notice my social profiles are clean of many things yet I know…a lot. I am blessed to be trusted and I would never want to do anything to abuse that trust.
This is my moral and ethical line. I am not trying to imply everyone should do the same. I legit don’t care what you do because I understand that it is none of my business. I don’t go around trying to tell random people what to do because people learn their lessons in their own time. I’m doing this for me. Do you.